The Kum and Go. Or as my mom called it, the ejaculate and evacuate.
Jizz and jet
shoot and scoot
blow your load and hit the road
bust ya nut and off ya strut
Sherlockian, Whovian, Potterhead. Amanda Abbington is a brilliant actress. Someone get me a silkie chicken plz ily. <3
seeing people hate on a character you can relate to the most
Fun Fact: I am VERY bad a hydrating myself. If I ever die unexpectedly it’s probably because I just forgot to drink water for a week.
professor flitwick was ruthless as fuck like he even addressed harry by his name whilst asking for his name
I think what I find even funnier is that Harry doesn’t use the ‘I’m Harry Potter’ response. He uses the ‘You’ve been my teacher for five years’ response.
shopping for clothes would be a lot more fun if i had a thinner body and a fatter wallet
One time in class we were talking about abortion and most of the girls talking were pro-choice and it was a generally calm discussion then one of the pro-life boys used the phrase
“if a girl is stupid enough to get herself pregnant in the first place-“
…he didn’t get to finish the sentence
im laughing so hard because of that gif.
u can see its tiny balls dropping
excuse me favorite character did i give you permission to die
I THREW A GRAPE IN THE AIR TO CATCH IT IN MY MOUTH BUT IT WENT TOO HIGH AND HIT THE CEILING AND THERE WAS A SPIDER THERE AND THE SPIDER FELL AND SO DID THE GRAPE AND THEY BOTH LANDED ON MY FACE AND I STILL HAVEN’T STOPPED SCREAMING
i read the first line in my head in the tune of call me maybe im so stupid
I threw a grape in the air
I went to catch it I swear
It hit a spider that fell
and now they’re on my face